in therapy my therapist and i were talking about my own feelings of self worth in relationships. and she asked me to say qualities about myself that someone else would be attracted to, on a romantic and platonic level. so i named some things like compassionate, empathetic, etc. and she said “you named things that you can give someone. ways you can serve, rather than ways that you are” and y'all..my mind was blown that’s gonna stick with me forever like she then proceed to tell me actual innate qualities about myself that she liked and thought anyone else would like as well and i hadn’t even considered those because like she said i was focused on things i could do outwardly to attract and maintain connections rather than who i was as a person..goddamn!!! thats tea!!!
But sometimes it’s better to choose your own family.
Shoplifters (2018) // dir. Hirokazu Kore-eda
Just perfect.
truly believe that there’s like… specific times in your life for you to discover certain music. or sometimes rediscover. like there’s some artists i tried listening to earlier in my life and i wrote them off bc i was Not Ready for them but now they like touch my heart and i get them now. they just click so easily into my life in the place that i am now. i just am so happy i have music in my life like gawd is it such an encouragement and support in a way nothing else is.
Cillian reads.
William Butler Yeats (1865-1939)
When You Are Old
When you are old and gray and full of sleep,
And nodding by the fire, take down this book,
And slowly read, and dream of the soft look
Your eyes had once, and of their shadows deep;How many loved your moments of glad grace,
And loved your beauty with love false or true,
But one man loved the pilgrim soul in you,
And loved the sorrows of your changing face;And bending down beside the glowing bars,
Murmur, a little sadly, how Love fled
And paced upon the mountains overhead
And hid his face among a crowd of stars.
